33 responses right now ↓

• 1 aj0010 // Jul 23, 2009 at 12:33 pm

  Kudos to you for this blog post. I agree with you that the absurd doctrine of “white supremacy” among Dominicans needs to be publicly, and loudly, dissected and repudiated.

  The African influence on the Dominican Republic, ethnically and culturally, is clear and strong. This is obvious to anyone with eyes, ears and an ability to reason. The fact that so many Dominicans have allowed themselves to be programmed to loathe their own African heritage would be laughable, if it wasn’t the direct cause of so much misery.

  Having said all that:

  I find it curious that you don’t see a contradiction between this statement:

  “…I implore you to make the decision that you think is best for you…”

  and the belief, expressed earlier in your essay, that you have some kind of right to “forbid” your sister from vacationing with a man?

  As you noted yourself, she’s 21 — well above the legal age of maturity.

  Not trying to inject myself into the dynamics of your family — just trying to (gently, I hope) point out what smells more than a little like hypocrisy.

• 2 Goddess Intellect // Jul 23, 2009 at 12:37 pm

  “What makes this even more saddening is that some of my cousins have Black friends. I wonder if those close Black friends of theirs would be cool with them if they knew their real thoughts on Black folk. I guess its cool to give them a pound and eat dinner with them. Watch Black folk try to speak Spanish and laugh. That’s all funny. But ‘you’ dating my sister, daughter or son? That’s where the laughter ceases. ”

  This is saddening! But its saddening because in the back of my mind I will always think that this will probably be the case with every non-black or black-in-denial-of their blackness person i befriend. And this is not just a thought that has not been proven to be true. From time to time I hear little slip ups, like “oh you dont really have that nappy black people hair” or “your hands are not rough like a typical black persons hands”- foolish right?
  side note: I’m enjoying this mini series…I may just have an idea for a collab brewing

• 3 admin // Jul 23, 2009 at 12:44 pm

  I love that you read my posts ajoo and visit the blog, but your nitpicking on this one a bit.

  Here is what I’m talking about:
  Having said all that:

  I find it curious that you don’t see a contradiction between this statement:

  “…I implore you to make the decision that you think is best for you…”

  and the belief, expressed earlier in your essay, that you have some kind of right to “forbid” your sister from vacationing with a man?

  As you noted yourself, she’s 21 — well above the legal age of maturity.

  Not trying to inject myself into the dynamics of your family — just trying to (gently, I hope) point out what smells more than a little like hypocrisy.”

  My response:

  I was being sarcastic. Of course I cant control it, but im pretty sure I wouldn’t be happy even if shes 21 or my parents would if she flew away with some guy out of nowhere.

  Its just being a protective brother man. That’s all. Of course I can’t keep her caged, but a lot of that comment was sarcastic. As you can see from posting on this topic, I’m pretty democratic when it comes to my sister.

• 4 admin // Jul 23, 2009 at 12:48 pm

  Thanks Goddess-Intellect. Definitely hit me with whichever mini-series idea you may have. You know I’ll be hitting you soon and replaying your recent topic on your blog here.

  Those comments I can imagine are very difficult to hear. Especially when they come from younger folk because even in their young age, they seem like they will never change.

• 5 aj0010 // Jul 23, 2009 at 12:50 pm

  I saw nothing in your post to indicate that you were employing sarcasm, but I withdraw my criticism nonetheless.

  My main point being that I agree with you wholeheartedly on the subject of the obsession with “white supremacy” that’s inherent in Dominican society. And I congratulate you for bringing it up in public.

• 6 admin // Jul 23, 2009 at 12:54 pm

  Hey man, feel free to criticize or praise. Whatever you may feel.

  You know I don’t keep certain comments from the site. Everything gets printed.

  I’d say you should look 3 or 4 pages back in this blog to see Vol 1, 2 and 3 which focus on this topic. See what I wrote there and i’d love to engage with you and see what you think.

• 7 david // Jul 26, 2009 at 5:59 pm

  I enjoy your blog. You are bright. Why the poor grammar and spelling?

• 8 admin // Jul 26, 2009 at 7:37 pm

  Anyone who knows me, knows that grammar and punctuation have been the bain of my existence.

  Since I began writing, I always had an in-house editor to correct all my mistakes. Now, I don’t and I’m getting used to it. Plus, I also have to blame laziness for it as well. I have to be more careful.

  Excuse the mistakes. I just uploaded this straight from my Blackberry and didn’t do a thorough check of it.

  Thanks again.

• 9 Autumn // Jul 28, 2009 at 1:38 pm

  i likes

  -daughter of a black panamanian and mulatto american always intrigued by the topic of blackness in latin american cultures (esp. dominican)

• 10 admin // Jul 28, 2009 at 1:42 pm

  Thanks Autumn for visiting and taking the time to read. I know many Panamanians who go through the same. Its really sad stuff like this is still focused on.

• 11 Lisa // Jul 28, 2009 at 2:12 pm

  Well, if the truth be told many Black Americans feel the same way about dating Dominicans.
  Black Americans are educated and have more money than their Dominican counterparts so why should we date you? LOL

• 12 admin // Jul 28, 2009 at 2:21 pm

  Lisa -

  Thanks for visiting the blog.

  As for your comment, all we are talking about here is people being able to get past color.

  I could care less who has more money between Black folks and Dominicans. That’s not the point.

  Oh, so whites shouldn’t date blacks because they have more money than blacks?

  As Big Pun would say: “Go that way.”

• 13 Yadira // Jul 29, 2009 at 10:31 am

  I second Lisa going “that way.” You sound ignorant. You’re embarrassing yourself. Stop it.

• 14 Tracey // Jul 30, 2009 at 5:15 pm

  I’m sorry to jump into the conversation so late, but I just learned of this blog and I find this topic quite interesting and I don’t think people typically provide honest remarks surrounding race.

  It’s sad that your cousins feel that way. There was a play a while back in the city, not sure if it still runs “Platanos and Collard Greens” and it spoke about the fractions within the Dominican race regarding color and hair. It all sounds very familiar to the color/hair issues African-Americans deal with.

  I totally understand your comment about your sis making her own decisions but also telling her to do what’s best. Anyone who is an older sibling knows we want our younger sibling to make wise choices and do what’s best for them, but at the sametime, we want to keep thinking of them as that kid from childhood. I’m a woman and I still at times treat my younger sister like my little cub. And I shouldn’t do that because we also have an older brother and I know how “protective” he was with me. But alas, it’s what we older siblings do.

  In regards to Lisa’s comments, I hope she was joking. I think she was. So maybe she doesn’t have to “go that way.” LOL. Sadly, most African-Americans are still trapped in Jim Crowe mindsets and believe light is right so if a fair skinned Dominican approached them, they would be eager to oblige the offer. I think given the proper setting and profile of the person they wouldn’t give 2 thoughts to the race factor. And there are ignorant AAs and ingnorant Dominicans. In both groups there are the haves and the have nots. No need to point them out.

  If one wants proof of the AA culture’s love of all things Latin one only has to go so far as BET or MTV and watch a couple music videos.Most AA men have cast their lead girl as a Latin woman. You don’t find any other race doing that. I don’t watch videos all that often, I can count on one hand how many times I tuned into BET this entire year. But I still know it to be fact.

  I’m completely for interracial dating as long as it’s from a sincere motivation and not because someone wants a child that will look a certain way to keep the “color palette.” It’s truly a tragic state of being.

  I find this Domincan race issue all the more intriguing because from the moment I moved to NYC I’ve been approached by Dominican men and still do. I’m an African-American woman and clearly so (or at least I think so) but they continue to approach me. I haven’t gone out with any yet because they all hang around my corner LOL but I wouldn’t go out with an African-American man that stood on the corner either. The only Dominican man who consistently flirts with me and I would consider going out with doesn’t speak English very well:-( He’s employed and seems like a nice guy, I just can’t deal with the language barrier. My Southern accent and his Spanish accent wouldn’t mesh well I feel:-0 But please keep posting prompts for honest dialogue.

• 15 anotherdominican // Jul 30, 2009 at 6:30 pm

  The real problem/greatness of being dominican or any carribean culture is that most of us are actually not one thing only. While its true there are pure african descent and pure european descent dominicans. they do not represent the majority of dominicans. Being dominican or cuban or puertoriccan is not being a race. It is a culture. I resent black dominicans the same way I resent white dominicans who try to superimpose their racial background/history and act as if ALL “real” dominicans are one thing or another. I am a racially mixed dominican and acknowledge all of my racial components. But I do not identify as white or black or indigenous because I am none of them because I am all of them in varying degrees. Being african dominican is no better or worse or “more” authentic than a pureblood direct descent spaniard dominican or indigeneous native. Your history as a dominican is quite different from mine but it makes neither more valid than the other.

• 16 admin // Jul 30, 2009 at 8:31 pm

  AD -

  I appreciate you visiting and taking the time out to comment on the blog.

  I embrace all aspects of my upbringing as well. I have a European descendant mom and an African descendant dad; both Dominican. I embrace each fully.

  I hope the blog didn’t come off as if I was embracing one side over the other. I was just putting out there how one side gets more discriminated upon than the other.

  Are you from the Wahi/Inwood area? Glad to see some Dominicans visiting.

• 17 JKISSI // Aug 12, 2009 at 9:23 am

  I constantly follow the Dominican Chronicles it’s just real interesting to hear some of the truth behind some topics.

  I’m a sucker for dark complexion Dominican as black as I am, I wonder if that will still be a problem?

• 18 admin // Aug 12, 2009 at 9:32 am

  Kissi -

  Some dark-skin Dominican women are even worse than light skin ones.

  They deal with the whole issue of being looked down upon, so their parents sometimes want them to marry light.

  The dynamic in this community is amazing.

• 19 JKISSI // Aug 12, 2009 at 11:38 am

  C,

  Wow , and I thought I was in a safe zone lol, but as you put it you’re completely right. It’s hard for people to get over their ignorance, only a few out the circle decide to think differently from the bunch.

  BTW – I like how your sister handled that situation with your cousins.

• 20 admin // Aug 12, 2009 at 11:41 am

  Thanks man.

  I’m not so sure how my sis would’ve handled that years back. But she showed growth and handled it as a “smart” human being should.

  As for Dominican women, dont let any of this scare you. They are too beautiful to be conscious of whether they will like you because of tone or whatever.

  Get yourself some nice rice, beans and pollo meals man. You won’t regret it. Lol.

• 21 delapaz // Aug 15, 2009 at 4:38 pm

  I am Glad as cubans we acknowledge that we can be black, white, mixed.

• 22 KT // Aug 20, 2009 at 5:12 pm

  Came across this blog by doing a google search and loved the entry and discussion. I have been fascinated with Dominicans and their racial identity and views for quite some time. In High School my best friends was Dominican, and my fascination with the culture and people grew from interacting with his family and friends. I’m Even more fascinated now that I live in the inwood/washington heights area.

  As a black West Indian, I saw many similarities in Dominican culture with my own culture: the music, the dances, the story telling, the family unit, etc etc (i see the similarities, but Dominicans don’t lol) I definitely had in common the immigrant story with my best friend, but I definitely knew although his family regarded me as black they branded me a different kind of black because I was from the Caribbean.

  From interacting with many of my Dominican friends, I hear so many ignorant racial statements. Statements about hair texture, skintone, not dating dark skin ppl, constantly talking about their “white heritage”. It upsets me at times, and it often feels like the race converstaion is moving backwards rather than forward. Which is not a good thing. This does not affect my love for the Dominican people and culture. I just hate that I cannot walk into a room of Domincans and not hear reference to my skintone, beign called negro,etc. It as if it’s a preoocupation with many Dominicans.

  I read somewhere that the views of Dominicans is a result of many being 1st generation immigrants. Comparisons were made to other 1st generation immigrant groups and the challenges of assimilation and cultural retention. Which makes me wonder, is the dislike for darkskin/”black features” more prominent among Dominican Americans, compared to Dominicans in DR? and is that dislike contributed to Dominicans often being called black? and what happens when you leave the tri-state/miami are for places like the midwest or west where america is still black and white? or places like Europe–Germany etc

  Anyways I was very proud of your sister and how she handled the situation. She challenged their thinking and confronted it head on and for that you should be very proud of her!!

  Thanks for posting and providing a sounding board

• 23 admin // Aug 20, 2009 at 5:27 pm

  KT -

  Thanks for visiting the blog. I really appreciate the support and you’re commentary.

  I think the views of Dominicans here may be more disappointing considering they are living in America.

  Dominicans in DR aren’t too fond of dark skin, but mostly if its of a Haitian person. Not so much with a Dominican.

  Women perm their hairs and do so much to get away from black ancestry. But they sure cant get rid of the black butt.

  If you are from the Caribbean, they may have a better view of you. If you are a light skin black, they may have a better view of you. If you’re dark skin, the views aren’t that great. Take it from me.

• 24 Dysal // Sep 13, 2009 at 8:22 pm

  Interesting you just said something about Haitians…I am one and I am currently dating a Dominican of Italian decent. We have a slu of potential issues. One the Haitian thing, two I am 8 years his senior and three I just learned that his grandfather basically raised his mom to dislike blacks. Now I do know my people come in all shades I am dark. It’s interesting because I mean if you wanted to rate ‘families’I grew up like the Huxtables..lol. My Dad is a cardiologist I never really wanted for anything, good education blah blah. My expectations of a partner are to treat me with respect and value my opinions. He does that. My particular family is mixed with everything under the son including, Dominican, ever European country imaginable, Japanese, Korean, Chinese, most of South America, all of the Caribbean and everything in between. Long story short my family doesn’t care so we spend time with them no problem. I met his parent one day by mistake but they don’t know officially we are dating, his little brother does, his friends and his cousins do. It’s going to be a journey because family is important to both of us. I explained my feeling and we talk about the future, marriage and children and all….before that happens I have to formally meet your parents….

• 25 admin // Sep 14, 2009 at 12:20 pm

  Dysal -

  I can imagine how difficult that is. My ex girlfriend was half haitian and her family was so put together and professional. People just have this perception of dark skin folk as the complete opposite.

  Family should never stand in the way of love. If you love someone, color is the last thing that should come into the equation. If he were to leave you because of family pressures, its his loss.

• 26 yOmaris // Sep 19, 2009 at 6:14 am

  I’m really enjoying your blogsite! I am the product of a Dominican mother, she is black. Beautiful dark mocha skin. And a half Cuban-half Panamanian father who could somewhat pass for white or “mulatto” “mixed” at the least. I also found out that somehow from my mothers side we are registered with the Cherokee Nation, i found that odd, but won’t claim it until i see the rolls for myself. Even though I am mixed with those three things, people always seem to deem me straight up Dominican. Like they just forget about the Cuban & Panamanian, it’s actually quite bothersome sometimes, but i’m really proud to be all of the above. Not putting one above the other, but since I’m mostly Dominican, I guess i don’t really bother to correct people on my full mixture since I know I already made it clear the first time. Like Eminem said, “I am whatever you say I am.” I live in the Midwest, so you won’t find many Caribbean Latinos here, it’s just rare, they look at me as exotic, different, and anyone who meets me thinks I’m not from here, although i’ve lived her 21 out of the 23 years of my life i’ve been on this earth. I was born in MA.
  Anyway, I’ve witnessed plenty of ignorance here as far knowledge of and exposure to Afro-Latinos…people in the midwest just don’t know much about ALs, it’s really unfortunate, i feel like, if you can’t travel, you atleast have the INTERNET at your disposal, yet you still walk around assuming you know everything, and if it’s not familiar to you, it’s suspect or lacks truth.
  I don’t feel i need to prove myself to anyone. I’ve even had people tell me I don’t “look” Spanish even though my name is. I was too appalled at the moment to give my retort but i guess that was fortunate for them. I’m not just SPANISH. I’m a mixture of things, and Spanish is just one of the many. She happened to be a Russian-American girl with a thick Russian accent but prefers “white.” Also, the predominant Latino pop. here is Mexican of course, although most of them prefer the term Hispanic over Latino here. Now they…LOVE me. my cafe con leche (my tita calls me canela lol) skin, they don’t know what to do! But still, some of them are just as blind to Caribbean culture as the AA’s and Caucasians here. What can ya do huh but try to educate them? But they still don’t want to listen long enough.
  I, like you, grew up with more liberal, open-minded Latino parents, when it comes to dating, but that’s just my parents, not ALL of my family is open and accepting. Those are the family I’ve kept at a distance for a while. Nothing wrong with loving them from afar. I didn’t mean to type you a whole novel lol, but i wanted to tell a bit of my background, and let it be known i can truly relate a lot to the things you blog about, i enjoy reading it. And your sister did a wonderful thing, being the bigger person, and not feeding into the b.s. I do not discriminate, i feel like race, ethnicity, nationality, color, etc. etc. should never be a factor when it comes to friendship, partnership, love, hell…ANYTHING. We’re all human, we all bleed the same color blood, and we all get buried in the SAME damn dirt when we die. Unless of course, you choose to go the cremation route. I know I’m posting on some of your older blog posts, but I’m just now discovering you and i’ll definitely be commenting on more! I enjoy it so much, i’m glad i came across it. Of course, I’ll lighten up a little on the keyboard. LOL. Ciao hombre.

• 27 admin // Sep 19, 2009 at 12:58 pm

  Thanks a lot and I appreciate the long response Yomaris. Really enjoyed reading about your experiences out in the Midwest.

  From your experiences, it seems like we’ve confronted similar scenarios throughout life on this issue.

  Stay strong on this and never fear to educate people.

• 28 Brodny // Sep 23, 2009 at 1:20 pm

  I am very proud to hear these stories as I am a man who is currently pursuing a Dominican Woman who is from the DR and I had been worried about the rumors about being played because I’m black just for a green card or a lot of other issues coming from dating a woman from DR.She is a beautiful caramel complected woman with a daughter as light as leche,but I am a dark skinned brotha with a Daughter the same.We have been trying to make this work and with forums like this and others we will make it para siempre,lol!If anybody would could give any information that will be helpful to us please do because we need all we can get because i live here in TN where racism is at its best and there is not a lot of latinos or latinas that even want to have black friends let alone date one.I also have a group on Migente.com something like this and if we can unite and fight together we can help a lot of people overcome these issuses like these that we are reading about

• 29 Brodny // Sep 23, 2009 at 2:30 pm

  I believe the problem is people are to judgemental about certain things they do not know about.Being a person who is trying to marry his Dominican sweetaheart you learn about this very fast and you just try to educate yourself and your other about the issues here and there while trying to be a couple.I have a group on Migente.com about spanish women who want to be with black men and i have over 150 members who agree with me on this topic,sadly i only have had very few people in my own city who see the same as I do,that people might be of different origins,races,cultures or whatever but they are just that people,I don ot care where a woman is from she wants to be happy,that goes for men also because when a person will go across the world to marry someone else that says a lot for the people he or she has been involved with,not all people are the same but not all are different.I want to extend a invitation to anyone with similar experiences like mine to futher this conversation on here and lets educate people,thats right people to live there life free of color boundaries.Being a black man in a southern state like TN I know first hand about racism here because unlike Cali or New York or Miami you do not see a lot of spanish ans black couples here.I am the first person in my entire family to speak to languages,I will be the first person in my family to marry a person of spanish decent and I dont care if they like it or not because nobody runs my life but me and only me,I dont care if my friends like it either.Let me give you an example.I have a woman from DR so you know this means I love and can dance bachata so I listen to it a lot,even in my own hood.When i feel like it, I will play the ocassional T.I. or Young Jeezy because I relate to them because like them I lived a street life also,but now I also listen to Aventura,Anthony Santos,El Torito,Raulin Rodriguez,etc…………..but when my friends here this they laugh at me hard as hell but I have a lot of spanish friends also and when they see me with them they are like wow how did you meet them and I want a woman who looks like that.I tell them the story about how I met my love and how myh friends introduced me to their music and food and other things and it changed whole thought process,but they say i aint doing that,I wont do that.Me listening to bachatamdancing bachata is no different from a spanish woman or man listening to rap or R&b.As a people we are to judgemental to things we dont know about.We are quick to judge people but do not want to be judged by anyone.and it should not be like that.Some people who see me driving and here me listening to music like bachata and who work with me think I am Cuban or Dominican or Hounduran because I am dark skinned but I tell them no I am not “yo soy negro cien por ciento”and they just look and start asking a lot of questionsand I walk away because I do not give them a chance to say anything bad about me.I am still new to a lot of things in DR but if anybody would like to help me out on a couple of things I am all ears,lol

• 30 Yomaris Fuentes b.k.a. Yomi // Jan 24, 2010 at 6:10 pm

  I just ran across this and I can’t believe it’s been over a year since I visited your site. Won’t happen again, I know that! lol.

• 31 admin // Jan 24, 2010 at 6:45 pm

  Aww thanks Yomaris I really appreciate it.

• 32 JARISELIA // Apr 10, 2010 at 9:30 pm

  this story is very touching, i have the exact same family, and for more than 8 years i had to fight my family, and make them understand how much in love i am with my black/white fiancee. And he loved me so much as well, that he fought with me too, he never once gave up on me, and finally after 8 years, they finally realized that he is a good man. I will never forgive them for that, i always love them, because ofcourse we are dominican, and thats how family of our race are. Love your story, very touching and very similar, and made me feel, who gives a f**k, you know? loll.

• 33 Carl // May 18, 2010 at 9:29 pm

  It never ceases to amaze or astonish me in some cases , how ignorant mankind as a whole can be , and how that ignorance spreads like cancer to entire generations yet unborn . Scientifically it is an undeniable fact that the most dominant gene in human heredity is black . For proof research Greogor Mendel . It reminds me of the 12 tribes of Israel , where it is scripturally documented that some of the Israelites were people of dark skin like the ancient egyptians. One thing I found about dominican history , is that so many indigenous people confuse their nationality with their race. A hebrew is not a race but a language , spanish is not a race but a language , an american is a description of one’s nationality but does not describe one’s race. This simple but obvious truth , could settle the entire Im better than you dispute because of my skin color . Self-Hatred is lethal even when its among the dominant culture ! W

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