This will be a series that includes the ignorant, fun, and sad quotes I directly run into during my week in my home, sweet, home…

#1 Who? My friend Tom Cruz’s barber on Nagle.

Tom: Why you so late man?
Barber: Cono loco estaba rapando (I was having sex)

Analysis: The barber shop opens at 9AM and you arrive at 12 because you’re having sex? No wonder your clients always leave you for the other barbers.

#2 At a local hole in the wall. It was me and the owner and I had a bottle of wine.

Owner: Your name?
Me: Claudio
Owner: Are you Dominican?
Me: Yes
Owner: I knew you couldn’t be just Black drinking wine. You had to be something.

Analysis: He was a nice guy up until that comment. I don’t know if I can bring myself to support him, though I think he was a nice guy aside from that comment which happened to come when I was leaving.

#3 Random old fellow at Jimbo’s between Post and Nagle on Dyckman:

“Cono pero (damn but) I wish I could become Mayor of Dyckman if there was such a thing. There’d be no age limits on who I can rapa (sleep) with. I like them young and in High School.’

Analysis: Sick, but forgive me for laughing when I heard this at Jimbo’s. Well, everyone found it funny.

So in this edition, you had a barber who keeps his clients waiting because he’s having sex, a owner of a store who knows no better that he said something ignorant, and an old, filthy Dominican man (plenty out here) who wishes he can sleep with any girl/woman “any age.”

Until next time…

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