The Council = Claudio aka Precise aka El Ranchero aka Claudio Salvatore De La Gama Bucci. Luis aka Minana, I got insurance to cover this (inside joke), el indio, King Luis. David aka Pacman, Crockett from Miami Vice, Papins (Dyckman Slang),

So a lot of people are like: “Claudio, Luis, David – why didn’t you guys go to Miami?” You see…we were contracted to go to Orlando. Actually, the guys in Miami have some sort of fashion sense, but the dudes in Orlando are seriously lacking in the “GAME” department and the “ROPA” (clothes) department. So the Orlando Women’s Coalition just gave us a paid trip to go down there and $10k in cash to talk to their pizazz-less young men. So we schooled them on approaching women and took them to the weak Orlando malls to pick out some clothes, etc.

Let me stop…I’m just kidding. But just like Jordan said in that commercial: “You reach, I teach.” In Orlando, “they saw and they learned.”

If you wondering why I had a pillow swinging in the air in one of those picks, it was one of the greatest pillow fights in history. I know, I know, you guys are like: “That’s so gay.” Whatever! We have fun. Plain and simple. People need to loosen up a bit.

Other than that, we went out to their version of Latin Quarters and Louie got his dance on. We then went to Lux on our last day and salsa’d it up on the dance floor. Ordered two bottles of Ciroc, but I’m trying to get a refund from that crook Diddy because it aint that smooth. We also played golf in which Luis beat me by two points and David finished dead last. Luis and me tag-teamed to win in pool against David and some drunk from the bar who called every woman “Mamita” and called me “homey” like he was from East LA.

What else? We were messing around with those Florida Gators and throwing food at those animales. Luis beat me in a fluke bowling game. I “choked” like Joe Johnson at the line two days ago, but whatever. I’ll be back.

And before I go, I gotta clap it up to Dave. Even though me and Luis picked out two vital pieces of his outfit, he wore it to perfection in Lux that night. He specifically said that: “I’m going to do the impossible (so flattered) and outdress Claudio tonight.” I’m sad to report that I suffered my first loss that night. I guess 2063-1 isn’t so bad. Kudos – you were very Florida with it.

Next stop: LA for Albert or Madison, Wisconsin for our buddy at UW.

P.S: Special thanks to Vanessa and Jeannine for letting your men out on this trip. Thanks babes. We had a great time.