I remember when I used to go out a lot whether it be to a restaurant, function, or even a bar or lounge, one question I always tried to avoid asking people is:

‘What do you do for a living?’

We as humans love to make assumptions and do so off simple stuff such as appearance, living space, vehicle, and occupation. Once a person finds out what you do, many begin to immediately classify you as a certain type of person.

‘Oh your a banker? You must have money and be greedy. Live downtown?’

‘Oh your a journalist? You must be broke and not concerned with making money. Do you even have a job right now?’

About a year ago, I remember one specific situation.

I was at a bar and saw one friend interacting with a woman. They were clicking for about an hour and before the night was over the woman asked him what he did for a living. From my vantage point, this woman was prepared to give my friend her number until she found out his occupation.

He told me once he told her what he did, her ’shoulders slumped.’

‘I work for the sanitation department for about six years now.’

Not that the money matters, but my friend makes a solid amount, has great benefits and lives by himself in a nice neighborhood. Aside from that, he’s a pretty good dude; and she knew that; but his occupation and her lack of enthusiasm over it trumped that.

Now I know that a great way to initially learn about a person is through their occupation. There is no denying that; I mean we spend the majority of our week there.

But at the same time, what ever happened to our conversational skills? What ever happened to introducing yourself to a person and asking a variety of things? Asking where they’re from, background, passions, hobbies, favorite eateries, etc.

What ever happened to that?

In this instance, the lady and my friend spoke about a bunch of things for an hour minus occupations. But there are too many times when that becomes the starter for a conversation. Everything is right to the point nowadays. Everything.

What people fail to understand is that there may be reasons as to why a person works here or there; and those aren’t the reasons most people would think of.

Ever thought that maybe the guy who works as a waiter may just be doing so because he lost his job as a banker?

The woman who works as a financial analyst may just be doing so because it helps her pay for her mother’s medical bills or brother’s tuition?

Its time that people stop picking up a book and forwarding to the last page. Nine times out of ten, you aren’t only missing out on a great story, but a great person.

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